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  • 10 hours ago
  • 8533

tensioned:

my anaconda wouldnt touch that with a 10 foot pole

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  • 10 hours ago
  • 3627
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  • 11 hours ago
  • 235469
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  • 11 hours ago
  • 189205

jethrocane:

sexioto:

so i was looking at lipstick and there were some interesting colors

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yes maybelline

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idk why you’d need this color but ok i guess

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lol me 2 

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is this the color of chilli though

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ok what

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?????

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????????

C O N S T A N T   T O A S T

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  • 11 hours ago
  • 247555
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  • 11 hours ago
  • 6558

cassjaytuck:

what if you started making car alarm noises when people you didn’t like touched you

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  • 12 hours ago
  • 651564

jessiej7732:

fox-power:

So my 13 y/o brother is on Xbox Live with his friends in the other room and the past 20 minutes I’ve heard him say

  • Dude why do you use gay as an insult?
  • You guys are fucking sexist, this is why I’m the only one of us who has a girlfriend
  • Wow that wasn’t racist or anything
  • No seriously gay does not mean stupid
  • BOOMSHOT!!!!!!!!!!

SO PROUD

PRAISE YOUR BROTHER

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  • 12 hours ago
  • 293264

newwavenova:

lilitudracul:

hokuto-ju-no-ken:

grubsludge:

funk-dabble:

littleleahlamb2k14:

grubsludge:

bury me in armor so I’ll be ready for the skeleton war

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ready

why is his fricking chest uncovered? that’s ppor planning right there

what are you gonna do?

stab a skeleton in the heart?

no, I’ll play their rib bones like xylobones and destroy the morale of the skeleton army with my sick and delightful xylobone playing

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I thought that skeleton was flipping everyone off.

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  • 12 hours ago
  • 209595

swarnpert:

noctstiel:

squarekun:

dead-lyrics:

pepperbear:

swarnpert:

7 billion people, 14 billion buttholes

a slight calculative error was made

anus georg

are you implying there’s a human named anus georg who posesses 7 billion buttholes

final boss

why does this happen

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  • 12 hours ago
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  • 14 hours ago
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  • 14 hours ago
  • 131525

steadymobbing:

steadymobbing:

i asked my mom how she met my dad and she said at a college basketball game this guy got distracted and got hit by the ball and got a huge bloody nose and he came up to her after the game and said “i was distracted by you” with like blood all over his face and jersey

so i asked my dad and he said “my friend told me he’d give me 10 bucks if i asked a girl out with my broken nose and she said yes”

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  • 14 hours ago
  • 197884

iwilleatyourenglish:

once i went to the movie theater with my friend who wears hijab and while we were sitting down she turned to me and said “people always ask me what i have under here. let me show you” and proceeded to whip out two dorito bags, three hostess cakes, and a pack of gummy worms

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  • 15 hours ago
  • 217003
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